


cardboard scripts

by maketea



Series: fictober 2019 [15]
Category: Miraculous Ladybug
Genre: Chat Noir Being Chat Noir, F/M, Humor
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-10-16
Updated: 2019-10-16
Packaged: 2020-12-21 19:07:14
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,427
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21061004
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/maketea/pseuds/maketea
Summary: chat noir couldn't memorise ladybug's colour-coded(!) script before their talk at françois dupont. ladybug has an idea.(it backfires).





	cardboard scripts

**Author's Note:**

> fictober day 15: "that's what i'm talking about!"

“Okay.” Ladybug pulled her thumb across the script and tapped it against her cross-legged lap. “Let’s go over this again.”

Chat Noir groaned. “Are you kidding? Didn’t we practice enough yesterday?”

“That was yesterday. I’m telling you to practice now.” Ladybug peered around the dark drop curtains and to the rest of the auditorium. So far, nobody had noticed she was gone — despite her pink rucksack occupying a chair. Not even Alya, who left the rest of their class to stand at the back of the room with her phone set on record. Ladybug turned back to Chat Noir. “Tell me what you’re going to say up there.”

He sighed. “Everyone feels negative emotions, from time to time. Remember, if you ever need anyone to talk to—”

“Hey! That’s what  _ I’m  _ talking about!”

“What? No it’s not.” Chat Noir sat up and turned the script towards him. “You’re talking about sending us tips about akuma sightings.”

Ladybug blinked at him. “Chat Noir… which parts did you memorise?”

“The red parts.”

“The  _ red parts? _ The  _ red _ —” She rubbed her brow, and looked at the chunks of text she highlighted —  _ colour coded _ , for God’s sake — specifically so this wouldn’t happen. “Why would you memorise the red parts?”

“Because you said those are my parts!”

“No! I said your parts are the  _ green _ parts!””

“Well,” he huffed, “it wasn’t very obvious.”

“Really? You really thought my lines would be” —she glanced down at the script— “‘superheroes can get  _ claw _ fully busy’?”

“I just thought you were switching things up a bit.

Dropping the script, she pinched the bridge of her nose. “Chat Noir…” 

“Can’t I just go on stage with the script?”

She slammed her hands on the floorboards. “Absolutely not! We told Mr Damocles we’re one-hundred-percent prepared!”

“A sheet of paper can’t be too bad.”

“No. It’s terrible.”

More and more  _ collégiens  _ filed into the auditorium, and the spotlights were already shining against the other side of the curtains. They couldn’t go on stage — not like this, not with Chat Noir reading from a silly colour coded script like it was show-and-tell.

Then, she zeroed in on a stack of squashed cardboard boxes, each one half her height, leaning against the wall.

She grinned, and snatched up a permanent marker from the floor. “I have an idea.”

Ladybug clambered up, pulled down the stack, and uncapped the permanent marker. She held the lid in between her teeth while she flicked through the script with one hand, using the other to scribble down Chat Noir’s lines with the other.

He leaned over on his haunches and watched her. “Not to rain on your parade, My Lady, but you’ll have to be on stage with me.”

“ _ I’m  _ not gonna be holding it up.” She spat out the cap, and peeked behind the curtains once again. The gallery Alya stood in front of and backstage were connected by a curving corridor — one Marinette would have taken three minutes to cross, but Ladybug could have taken one. “I know someone who can.”

She slammed a full-stop into the last part of Chat Noir’s text, then — cardboard boxes in her arms — fumbled with the backstage door, and crept into the corridor. She rushed through it, jiggled open the door at the end, and sprinted into the gallery.

“Psst,” she said.

Alya looked up. “Ladybug? Is there an akuma?”

She hoisted the cardboard up. “No, nothing that bad. Well,” —she eyed the corridor she came down— “ _ hopefully _ not that bad.”

Alya listened intently while Ladybug handed her the cardboard. She seemed reluctant to pocket her phone, but carried Chat Noir's script in both arms gladly once Ladybug promised her an exclusive interview after the assembly was over.

As soon as the chatter died down, and Mr Damocles marched onstage, Ladybug gave Alya a last thumbs up, and headed back down the corridor.

She cracked open the backstage door and slipped through it quietly. Chat Noir was looking out of a gap between the curtains.

Unsmiling, turned at her footsteps. The sudden crowd must have startled him — Ladybug already had her fair share of freaking out before leaving the house, though it still surprised her when she realised she could walk without shaking.

"You know me, kitty," she said. "I always have a plan."

He smiled at her, then turned back to the curtain.

"Please welcome, our own superheroes," Mr Damocles said, "Ladybug and Chat Noir!"

The curtains swept aside, and, squinting at the hard spotlights, Ladybug and Chat Noir waved to their school. They could barely make out the audience with all the lights beating down on them, but Alya's place at the back was perfect for Chat Noir to read from the cardboard.

"We're really glad to be here," Ladybug said after their applause died down.

Chat Noir threw an arm around her. "I'm glad to be wherever you are, My Lady."

She pulled a face, and everyone laughed. At first, when Ladybug had been drafting the script, Chat Noir suggested a few ammendments. Some — such as rewording a sentence that ran on for five lines — she took on board. Others — such as shamelessly flirting with her in front of five hundred teenagers — she didn't.

But it seemed to garner a good response. Nevertheless, she nudged him in the ribs.

"We're both glad to be wherever you all need us," she said, "so we can keep you all safe."

"Yeah." 

Ladybug sent him a look. That was  _ not _ on the script.

(She ignored the voice —  _ his _ voice — in her head telling her to loosen up).

Chat Noir stepped forward, and Alya held the cardboard up higher. "Our priority as superheroes is to protect Paris to the best of our ability."

Ladybug balanced his odd stance by stepping beside him. "And with your help, we can do an even better job."

She watched him warily, and could only hope he didn't sound as unnatural as she did whenever she had to read something out. Perhaps next time they had to give a talk, Ladybug would write his name in block capitals next to each of his parts.

She tried her hardest not to squeeze her eyes shut, but still braced herself for his lines.

"Sometimes, it's hard for us to know where an akuma is," he said. "Sometimes, we don't even know someone's been akumatised — superheroes can get  _ claw _ fully busy."

Another laugh from their school. Ladybug sighed in relief. She hadn't even realised her hands were trembling until she clasped them together.

"So, we've set up hotlines for you to call if you see an akuma, so you can let us know right away." He gestured to the projector behind them. Two phone numbers appeared on the projector behind them.

"These are for emergencies," Ladybug said. "It's very important you only use these numbers for information on akumas only."

It had been going well. Chat Noir said his lines as if reading scripts was what he was really up to in between saving Paris. Alya's hold on the cardboard was perfect, and Ladybug dared to relax enough to untangle her fingers and talk more with her hands. 

(They still trembled, though).

"We know how hard it is to control how you feel," she said. "Chat Noir and I have our bad days, too."

She gave him a reassuring smile. He had done so well, she was sure he could take it from there.

"But you all need to remember that the way you feel is not your fault. It's uncool of Hawk Moth to use our feelings against us — we're teenagers, and… we… uh…"

With a swelling of dread in her stomach, Ladybug whipped her head up. 

Alya had the cardboard held high, the spotlight not illuminating it directly, but enough to be distinguished from the silhouettes of the audience. Chat Noir, with his sharp cat-vision, would have had no problem reading from it.

If the cardboard were the right way around.

He crept further and further away, further towards the spotlight, murmuring and mumbling under his breath while he strained to say his lines. 

Ladybug reached out. Fingers brushed his shoulder. Just about to take over — she knew the gist of his lines, anyway — when Chat Noir crept a step too far towards the spotlight, and fell off the stage.

He landed with a thump. The audience all made a pitying sound.

Ladybug winced. "We need to watch our step," she said dryly.

Chat Noir's hand rose from the edge of the stage and pointed a finger. "Listen to the lady."

She groaned.

**Author's Note:**

> posting this a day late because i over-excited myself over miracle queen yesterday and couldn't focus on writing..... rip
> 
> today's fic should be up within the next hour!


End file.
